* warning, quasi-cheesy post ahead *
So yesterday I had to take I-44 on my way back home after dropping off my lovely special lady friend to whom I am betrothed. Highway 40 was closed in st. louis (ugh) and there's this one part where 44 and 55 split off. On the road, they have painted a giant I-44 West sign, in full color and everything. It was great! I don't often take that way home, plus it was dark with a wintry mix about which further impaired my confidence in where I was going. Also, I only have 1 headlight currently functioning. Anyways, I loved crossing over it and knowing full well that I was where I needed to go.
I thought, "hey, that's a great cheesy intro to a blog post about life, direction, etc" So here it is. As I thought about it further, I have thought this way about being on the highway for a while. When there's an exit sign before the exit, you know the one with the yellow "exit only" strip with an arrow pointing to the lane, I love that. It started when I was 16. I always would want to be right under the arrow. Even now, knowing that you don't have to be right under the arrow because of the ways the highways merge two lanes can go the same direction, I still prefer being under the arrow.
I think this is how a lot of us feel about life. We like the certainty, the satisfaction of knowing that we're where we need to be. Now, how we know that and who determines "where we need to be" and even who "we" is could all be seperate discussions. But let it suffice to say that people like security, especially in terms of our lives and plans we're making for the future. Even not making plans to change anything is still having plans.
The problem is life doesn't work like that great I-44 West sign does it? Almost a year ago I wrote a post about how I believe young adulthood is like another puberty. I know so many people my age who are struggling just to figure out what kind of person they are and how to determine their next steps.
A big frustration for me is that in trying to make decisions and seeking God's guidance for my life, it doesn't seem to work the way it does in the Bible. I don't hear clear audible voices. I don't have prophetic dreams. No angels appear to me (that I can tell anyway). I freely admit this could be totally my fault. But I think a lot of us would LOVE to recieve a "vision" telling us how to proceed.
Sometimes feeling like being under the yellow trimmed arrow would be nice huh?
I consider myself extremely lucky. I have found love, I have a career and a calling which I love, and I feel very secure in the choices I've made to work in ministry, and especially at my church- so this is not a veiled cry for support from EUMC people. I'm just saying I have experienced a disconnect with Biblical prophecy and my personal experience. Anyone else? Anyone feel differently?